Still birth and early infant death

If you have just birthed a baby who has died or if your precious one only just barely lived, then amongst your shock, pain and disbelief, I send you my heartfelt compassion. I truly feel deeply for your loss.

Of the grief that washes through families, one of the hardest to find a place for, are the babies whose stories never grow older. Though, the reality of still born babies affects six couples in Australia everyday and the silence surrounding their pain is deafening.

There is silence because there are no words to make things right.

But when we can let you do the talking, when we can open our hearts to your pain and sorrow, we can give you the chance to make place for your loss. When we can make the space for all of your experiences to be acknowledged... we can give you the chance, to heal from something that is so very real.

There are times in all of our lives that grief washes through with uncontrollable torrents of emotion. Moments where we all feel threatened to drown in the seemingly never ending depth.

In the times when grief is overwhelming, professional help can bring

you relief and clarity.

It is the feelings we shut off from and our unhealed grief, that armours our hearts and manifests as self-judgement, fear, guilt, anger and blame¹.

Speaking with a counsellor can lessen the intensity of grief by giving you skills to keep you afloat, it can break the aloneness that follows unspeakable losses and it can help you grab the edges of your own sense of meaning.

The ancient Tao Te Ching says:

"If you open yourself to loss, you are at one with loss and you can accept it completely."

Surrendering to grief such as yours is true courage,

but it most probably feels like it isn't.

If you have a friend who needs support or if you would like to speak with me personally then call (+61) 0408 797 349 or email here.

With gentle clarity, time and understanding, it is possible to heal the damaged pieces of a precious mothering heart.

1 LEVINE, Stephen. The Grief Process